Korea, Here I Come!

In less than 24 hours I'll be in Korea breathing that crisp, cool air of spring and hopefully it's tinged with the smell of cherry blossoms...

The World Is As Perfect As You Make It.

I've heard the term "be comfortable in your own skin" many times over in my life (we all do), but no matter how much conviction I put every time I say those words, I still can't get past my innumerable body issues and weight drama. For four years, I've shared a love-hate relationship with my body. There are times when I appreciate my curves, and there are times when I get enveloped in a lot of depressing body drama. Sometimes I can't help but think that things seemed much simpler when we were younger and living a life of simple ideals. It's so easy back then - weight and calories are basically the farthest thing in our heads. In a perfect world, weight should be a non-issue, and there shouldn't be a skinny standard that exist alongside the premises of love, honesty and respect. But the real world sucks and sadly it's far from perfect.

Before, I blamed my being overweight from a myriad of excuses. But simple logic brought me to the conclusion that it's just me being lazy and complacent. I did try to lose the extra weight, but I keep gaining it back. Probably because as soon as I see results, I grow complacent again. But everything changed after I visited the doctor a few months ago. I went through what I call a 'health scare' and it shook me to the core. My health was a mess, my hormones were all shooting in the wrong direction, and I feel things I shouldn't be feeling. I knew I had to do something before it's too late. So I started hitting the gym again, this time with utmost determination, not just to aesthetically look more pleasing but to heal myself. I had to work doubly hard to efficiently burn calories as my metabolism seems to be a wack compared to a normal person's. And as per doctor's order, I veered away from meat, sweets and oily foods. I changed my routine, even my sleeping habits, refrained from eating out and drinking alcohol. I was struggling with the new lifestyle at first, but it's hell of fun discovering what good it does to your skin and the amount of money you could save. The only thing I didn't do is starve myself. I still eat as much as I want, only this time, I surround myself with healthier choices. And because I'm taking a lot of pills, my stomach can't be empty so I eat every two hours.

Just before the Holy Week started, I visited the doctor for check up and my blood work showed amazing results! My AST levels have normalized and I can now eat meat. How great is that?! But instead of celebrating at a meat restaurant, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. Yeah I know, it's weird, but as shameful as it sounds, I had difficulty shopping before because I could hardly fit in a normal store's sizes. But now it's different, and it's such a liberating thing to buy one that actually fits without going through the humiliating "do-you-have-a-bigger-size-than-this?" talk with the saleslady.

In today's skinny standards, I still have A LONG WAY TO GO, but overall I'm proud to say I'm healthier, fitter and stronger. Those three words make me happy, plus the fact that I can now run without getting so winded that my lungs want to burst.

Have a great weekend y'all!

So much for normalcy.

The past week has been a huge metamorphosis and two things happened that will surely shape up the things to come. I finally bid adieu to my only sibling who left the Philippines for good. It was an emotion-filled day at the airport, and the almost-palpable sadness was a little too much to handle. I planned to be all rock star and not shed a tear, but as soon as I saw her getting teary-eyed, I cried like a baby. Days after that, I found out that I'm sick, and though it's not life-threatening as it is, it would require me to be on meds for God knows how long. I haven't fully recuperated from the fact my sister wouldn't be a bus ride away anymore, and now another of Life's bitter pill. And this pretty much squeezes out any positivity left in me. My life seems to be perpetually hounded by tragedies, and sometimes I wish I could have a blissfully normal 28-year old life where boys, buds and wardrobe are the only things that occupy my thoughts.

I'm not in a really good place right now. In this pit of uncertainties, changes, and adjustments that overwhelms me, I was inspired to create a playlist and the songs I've chosen best represents how I feel. Music is where I find healing and it's where I find hope.

Bang-for-the-measly-buck.

This year, I've committed myself to doing more things in life, and that being said, I'm gonna kick up this year's list of must-do's by indulging in my ultimate guilty pleasure... I'm heading to Thailand for a few day fun-in-the-sun, and my head goes into a dizzying spin thinking about all the fun things I could do there!

It hasn't been a month since I left the country to visit Japan, and here I am, dusting my battered luggage again for another ride. I didn't plan this trip though, so I need to be at my stingiest, penny-pinching self. That means I'm gonna have to stay away for shopping as much as I can, away from swanky beach resorts and heavenly massages. But even with all those sacrifices, I think this trip is gonna be just great. To start off, I got a really sweet deal from the airline. They'll let me fly sans the meal for half the price! I don't have a problem with that considering I'm willing to sit in the cargo section for the same price anyway!

I'm glad I've come to an age where I can cast off pretensions and just relish this fascination. I think if certain things make you happy, then by all means, go ahead and do it - no matter what other people say. Without it, life would just be sooo uneventful right?

A Time To Reflect.

I sometimes can't believe how time seems to fly, and how everything seems to pass in a blur. In a whiff 2009 has ended, and now I'm hanging a crisp, new calendar with hopes that the new year would be as equally colorful, if not better.

'Colorful' is the best way to describe the past year. I commemorated important milestones, reunited with long-lost friends, patched things up with my family, rekindled old hobbies, and welcomed monumental changes that permeated every aspect of my life.

And as for my greatest passion that is travelling, 2009 has indeed took me for a spin and it was one hell of a ride! I was able to visit so many good places, saw myriad of beautiful sights, and got to experience things I could only dream of as a kid. It's so nice to look back and relive all the fun and bittersweet memories of the 178 posts I made that year.

This year I dream of doing more things in life - to visit more places, to meet more people, and to achieve more things that'll make me proud. 2010 is gonna be a great year, and wherever it takes me, I'm sure I'll always be pleasantly surprised.

"When it rains, it pours"

It has been a tumultuous two weeks. To be articulate and descriptive, I say it was more like a scary rollercoaster ride. The first blow came when I heard that my uncle died last week, and eventhough I've only seen him a couple of times before, his death was still a tragic news. It was all too sudden and my 82-year old grandmother found it hard to process and accept. She fell ill upon hearing the news, and now she's recuperating in the hospital. There's also this trip my family went to, along with my sister's in-laws. They went to Palawan to take a breather from the city, but the torrential rains didn't just ruin their trip, it also left them stranded there for a week. A four day 'fun-in-the-sun' they planned turned out to be a seven day disaster as flights back to Manila were cancelled and got everyone worried to bits. On top of all this, Chris and I had our biggest, longest, and craziest fight ever, and by 'crazy' I mean pretending to be strangers which was excruciatingly hard by the way. That was the biggest blow.. Like my grandmother, everything was hard for my brain to process, and I've been in and out of fever for the past two weeks. This usually happens when I'm stressed beyond my limits. Every inch of my body hurts, my hair started to fall which made me switch shampoo thrice in a week. I was physically exhausted and emotionally spent that I seriously considered going on a temple-stay for 2 days just to clear my head. Chris declined of course, and I'm thankful that he did or else, we wont be able to fix our issues and work out our differences. I don't really trust myself when we're having troubles and we're away from each other. I'm surely gonna plot some vile and wicked things, even if I'm in the company of monks. He already gave me his sincerest apologies this week with a promise that he's gonna work harder to make me happy, so I'm putting all the absurdities and childish/selfish idiocies currenly on hold, and I try to remember the things that made me fall in love with him. It's better this way you know, to count things that you like about a person, than to stress yourself finding all of his flaws.

To celebrate our reconciliation, Chris is taking me to a 5-day trip to Gyeongsang-do and Cheolla-do, and we are leaving early tomorrow. But this constant rain and dark clouds are making me really worried. God knows how much I want this trip, how much I need to relax, unwind, and take a breather from all the anxieties that drove me crazy for the past two weeks. I need to feel the wind on my cheeks, to feel the sand on my feet, to smell the pine tries, and see the lush green mountains. I need to get lost and get bitten by mosquitoes in a thick but serene forest, to cool down in a stream, to paddle in a river, see a cave, and get my picture taken at some random waterfall. And if it's not too sinful to ask, I need to get a nice tan to remind myself after that I had one of the best summers of my life. To hell with heat and humidity! I've got the strongest sunblock known to man, and a plastic fan given by some random stranger to keep me cool all throughtout the trip.

I may be asking too much, but more than anything, I wish that this trip is gonna be free from all the theatrics and the drama of arguments and disputes that suffered me for the last two weeks. I need this trip to act as a 'bond' to glue all the broken pieces together. And to remind us, myself specially, that there's no one in this world that we'd rather be with but each other.

Thoughts on blogging.

Before I met Chris, I knew very little of this country. Even if I was surrounded by Koreans for years, I still couldn't get a 'feel' of their country and culture. Whenever I ask them to describe Korea, I usually get a generic response like "Korea is very beautiful", "it's very clean", and "it has four seasons" like they learned that from school or something. Maybe it's because of the language that's why it's so hard for them to describe Korea the way I wanted them to, or maybe it's something else.. Hanging out with them taught me a couple of things about their culture like how they value age, their love for drinking (that's why you could always find them in bars around Manila), and their obsession with education. But no matter how many Koreans I meet, there were still so many things I couldn't understand, and so many questions were still unanswered.


After I met Chris, I became more and more eager to learn about his country. Sure there are so many stuff you could read on the Internet, but I find blogs more informative. I wanted to know how it's like to be here, 'see' things that they see, and 'feel' things that they feel even if I was thousands of miles away from this country. I consider myself lucky for having to read Anabanana's blog before, because her posts answered a lot of things I couldn't understand. She inspired me in so many ways, so when I came here, I wanted to do the same thing. I wanna be able to share my experiences not just through words but also pictures, cause there might be someone like me out there, who wants to know how it's like to be here, 'see' things as I see them, and 'feel' what I feel. I'd sometimes receive kudos comments that inspire me to write and share more. But there's one that flattered me the most, and it says "parang nakapasyal na rin ako sa Korea", cause that's exactly my purpose for blogging.


I like to keep it real, no pretense or whatsoever. When I'm sad, bitter, happy, or angry I say that straight-up. I make fun of myself, laugh at my insecurities, and I even write personal stuff that I shouldn't be saying. I never intended to boast cause life here isn't as sweet as some people would think. This is exactly the way I wanna present my life here in Korea. It's what I like calling "bitter-sweet", both pleasant and painful, sad and happy, boring but sometimes fun!