Missing Oppa.

Chris is down with a bad case of flu. We talked over the phone yesterday.. he said he's so sick that he couldn't get out of bed. In times like this, I regret not being there for him. He rarely gets sick, but when he does, it's quite serious and he needs someone who'll take care of him.

I miss him terribly, and I know he misses me just as much. When we talked, he said he wants me to 'come home' soon. I want to see him too, but I'm doing my best to stop myself from jumping on the next plane back to Korea. I think it's too soon and I've got a lot of things to accomplish first.

We know for a fact that we couldn't stand being away from each other, so every separation, every goodbye is agonizing. The day before I departed from Korea, Chris took me out on a date. We first went to a Gamjatang restaurant. He didn't eat much and he kept on giving me the meat. Then we went to see "The Reader". The story was good, but I wasn't into it. We went to a wine bar after that.. he ordered this fancy wine which I didn't approve of. But he said it's a special day so we shouldn't think about the price.. We stayed in a hotel that night. We played "S-O-S" (a game that was famous during my grade school days), we drank, wrestled each other, and I even made him wear a headband (he didn't allow me to put make up on his face). But more importantly, he talked about his feelings, how much he loves me... I've never heard more " I Love Yous" in one night in my entire life!

On my departure day, my flight was delayed so we get to spend more time at the airport. While waiting for my flight, he scribbled something on a piece of paper. When he gave it to me, he asked me not to read it till I'm inside the plane. He hugged me and kissed me a couple of times before he led me to the immigration door. He was crying a little, and that made me extremely sad. When I was on the plane, I read his letter and I couldn't help crying.. He wrote how much he loves me, and that he couldn't live without me. But the thing that made me cry was the fact that he was saying sorry if he ever did something that made me feel sad and unhappy.

I really miss him.. I miss the revolting smell of his ginseng tea... I miss the sound of his alarm... I miss his noisy fridge, and his never ending phone calls. I miss his little notes, and the way he makes my tea... I miss the fact that he knows everything, and has an answer for all my idiotic questions. Behind his back, I would try to google it, and I even miss how upset I become cause he's always right. I miss his standard three calls a day while he's at work, and the way he carries my bag whenever we go out. I miss everything about him, and I couldn't wait till I finally see him.