Return to Normalcy

Vacation is almost up, time to go back to the place where I should be. Just how does it feel to be leaving Manila again?!

I'm no way nationalistic by nature but I do know how to appreciate my birth country. There are so many things cool about Manila, and I haven't felt that in other countries I visited. If I were to describe Manila in one word, it'll be "CHILL". That's the perfect word for it.

I learned from school that Manila came from the word "Maynilad" or "where there is nilad", a flowering mangrove plant which I haven't seen nor heard of in my entire life! I guess it became extinct, annihilated by the war, or whatever.

Wait, I'm baffled by the fact that I'm from Q.C. and not from Manila. This is a complex I learned during my stay abroad. Foreigners usually know the capital city of PH as Manila and whenever I'm asked where I am from, I gladly reply Manila eventhough I'm from Q.C. because they do not usually know the surrounding cities of Manila. And if I ever mention Q.C., they'd think it's some rural province way outside Manila (had to tell them that it's part of the outskirts of Manila over and over again!!!) and I do not want to be known as the small time, rural girl hailing from the boondocks far away from civilization. I'm not being bashful here but the truth is, when foreign people (esp whites) think about country-side place of the PH, they think of the outbacks, a 'very-rural-under-developed back of beyond' kinda place where cows and water buffalos freely roam the streets.

And why the hell is it so difficult for them to pronounce the word QUEZON!!! I am sparing myself the embarassment of repeatedly saying how Quezon City should be pronounced not to mention telling them that I'm not from "Quezon" the province south-east of Manila and that it's a different place both geographically and economically eventhough it's basically both from Luzon.

For whatever it's worth, I surely love all parts of PH. But eventhough this is my birthplace, it's only good enough to be 'just' a vacation spot for me. With all the crimes, political innuendos, poverty, gap between rich and poor, and immeasurable debt surrounding the country, can people still find hope with everything in between? I don't thinks so.

If I could be a President and If I were to give people a choice as to stay here or go abroad, I think PH will be a ghost town, desolated.

I'm sadden by the fact that I finally gave up hope for my country. I say to myself "Have I forsaken my country?" or "Have I been long forsaken?" It saddens me more that for me, going abroad means going back to normalcy. Going back to a place where I could just be a care-free citizen (though I'm not), earning decently enough for my needs and seeing people with compassion for everyone. I can't remember how long it has been since I last saw/experienced this in my own country,